Bob, meet our nemesis, EEEEEEEEEVIL WHEAT-BEAST!


Shoh ’nuff. “Bob” just announced on his Mill Room blog that two of the Big Cheeses at Bob’s Red Mill are going gluten-free for a month. The kid part of me says, “Whoop-dee-doo, welcome to life in Strict Dietville, you healthy jerkies,” (said in the nicest way possible, of course) but the adult part of me congratulates them on their open-mindedness and willingness to see the world through the gluten goggles we celiacs must wear. Honestly, when I venture outside the confines of my well-stocked kitchen and into American Food World, I am absolutely, positively FLOORED by how universal gluten is. Americans live on gluten (no wonder they’re so jiggley)! Save the spotted banana and the wax apple by the counter at every Starbucks/Panera/Caffe Bacci/Corner Bakery/blah-dee-blah, we inhabit a sea of gluten. It’s a bummer, dude, because there are so many other worthy grains out there. Let’s hope Bob’s Gluten-Free Gladiators inspire legions of people to abandon their gluten addiction and encourage the proliferation of other grains in our diet. Amen, sistah.